Current Events

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

Recent Outage

I apologize for our recent downtime. We changed servers and it was necessary. I didn't realize that it would render us dead for three days straight or I might have said something. Again, apologies. We should be good to go for the forseeable future. - Supervisor 194 22:34, 28 May 2008 (PDT)

Er, ok, one day straight. Not as bad as I thought. Still, sorry. - Supervisor 194 22:40, 28 May 2008 (PDT)

This has to be some sort of record

Over the past 24 hours we have had four new contributors that don't suck ass. I logged in today and didn't have to put the beatdown on anybody at all, despite almost a whole page worth of contributions! Way to go! - Supervisor 194 09:44, 21 February 2008 (PST)

Sorry About the Recent Login Problems

The spam killing software was misbehaving. It's all fixed now. - Supervisor 194 19:41, 7 December 2007 (PST)

A Successful Upgrade

What a pain in the ass. Anyway, we're now running on MediaWiki 1.6.9 (previously we were on 1.4.3). This is the highest version that my sysadmin's version of PHP will support. We have been having problems with spambots here again lately, so I' am upgrading and installing a bunch of extensions in the hopes that it will greatly improve our ability to deal with the fucking morons who run these stupid bot farms. - Supervisor 194 14:44, 1 July 2007 (PDT)

• Update: ConfirmEdit (a captcha) has been installed, as has the most recent Bad Behavior plugin. Both of these systems work to help eliminate spambots. Here's hoping. - Supervisor 194 16:49, 1 July 2007 (PDT)

500 Articles!

We have reached 500 articles! Congratulations, us! - Supervisor 194 07:58, 15 Apr 2007 (PDT)

PLATINUM STAR Contest - Winner Has Been Chosen

And the winner is Jazu! Thanks to everyone who participated.

By the way, this contest was a HUGE success, even if there were only six entrants, because the shit that came out of this contest was way funnier than anyone could have come up with on their own, so I want to make it clear that the contest will continue.

Anyway.

I'm going to go ahead and put this up, because I'm sure that a lot of people six people are curious. I read the entries in the Government (Contest) - and I read them for the first time TODAY! I have chosen a winner. Before I made my final choice of a winner, I had my significant other read them all also, without saying who I thought should win. In the end, we both agreed on the winning entry. However, since all of the entries were outstanding, I have decided that the final Government entry will be compiled by me, and it will contain all the best elements of all the entries. But anyway. I will announce the winner tomorrow, because I need to manufacture the Platinum Star and I have not the will to do it tonight. - Supervisor 194 20:51, 26 Aug 2006 (PDT)

• I'd like to point out the absence of any sex-identifying pronouns on said "significant other" --Fbi2thegrave 03:09, 27 Aug 2006 (PDT)
  • Her name is Jennifer, HTH. -- Supervisor 194 16:54, 28 Aug 2006 (PDT)

PLATINUM STAR Contest - Extended to August 25

Out of deference to the fact that there are only four entries, I'm extending the contest until August 25th. If you were thinking of entering, but were  about the deadline being too close, you may now rejoice!  - Supervisor 194 12:42, 14 Aug 2006 (PDT)

PLATINUM STAR Contest - Win a Free SA Upgrade!

If you decide to enter, consider reading the Style Manual.

We are proud to announce a new contest at EOS for something called a PLATINUM STAR, in all capitols demonstrated as such, which will be given to the winner of a contest which the rules are following this paragraph.

This paragraph explains the rules of the contest. From July 25th to August 15th, there will be held a contest of which there has been no equal other similar contest. The top most wanted article will be open to this competition (As of today, it is Government). Everyone who wants to take part in this contest need only to write their version of Government entitled "Government (User name)" and post their article in the Government (Contest) page. The Government (Contest) page is like a disambiguation page, in which contains all the authors for a certain article. The PLATINUM STAR will be unveiled on August 16th, when this month's judge, Supervisor 194, decides to choose a winner. All entries, unless they're fucking horrible, will remain on Encyclopedia of Stupid forever as links at the bottom of the Government entry. The winner, however, will become the permanent entry for Government and will be honored on the front page. Along with the PLATINUM STAR, you will recieve a SOMETHING AWFUL DOT COM FORUMS UPGRADE (or 10 bucks paypaled to you). May the best fucker win! -- Fbi2thegrave 23:29, 24 Jul 2006 (PDT)

• NOTE: If you plan to enter or you DO enter - and you choose to read the other entries, you do so at your own risk (frankly, I suggest just not doing it). If I find anything that makes me feel like you read other articles and were like "damn, that's a good angle, I should jump on that!" I will be off-put. Just write your funniest article and leave it at that! -- Supervisor 194 19:33, 28 Jul 2006 (PDT)

Here We Go

This is the August banner. It will go up August 1, and so therefore we can expect a lot of hosers to be joining and adding useless content. -- Supervisor 194 11:25, 24 Jul 2006 (PDT)

August SA Banner

There won't be a banner ad in July. I'm taking a break to see how many users we get in a month without that boost. I'm expecting that there will be a tipping point at which so many people are talking about EOS and linking to it, etc, that banners will no longer be necessary. I google for EOS at the end of every month and more and more people are finding us out, so that's cool. Anyway, the August ad will ape our most successful previous ad, but instead of SLUTS, BOOZE, UNIX it will be WHORES, DRUGS, MAC OSX. Tee hee. -- Supervisor 194 14:19, 11 Jul 2006 (PDT)

I Am Seriously Considering Banning Anyone With Double G's in Their Name

You don't think I'll do it? Fucking try it. Fbi2thegrave 00:51, 11 Jul 2006 (PDT)

June SA Banner - Now With More Fbi!

Thanks to Fbi2thegrave for creating the June SA banner! May's banner generated about 50 new users. Hopefully the new creative blood behind this month's banner will generate even more. Supervisor 194 10:42, 2 Jun 2006 (PDT)

May SA Banner Is Up

I'm experimenting with what gets the most clicks. The first banner (which was static), back in January, generated about 40 new users. February, the first animated banner, generated 50. April, which was animated and featured "SLUTS BOOZE UNIX" in a big font, generated 62. This month's banner features white on black and appeals to goons specifically, with the slogan "GOON WISDOM - SUCH AS IT MAY BE." It's always interesting working out the psychology of what makes people click on shit. With any luck, we will not only beat 62 users this month, we might end up with another FBI or FKD. This past month generated 62 users, but not a single decent fucking article from a new user.

Upgrade didn't quite work out

So, I attempted to upgrade to MediaWiki 1.6. If you can believe it, this six month old wiki is now two full versions behind, as it is built on 1.4. Six months they took to rewrite the whole database so deeply that two attempts at upgrading failed me miserably. The next time I attempt an upgrade I'm going to have to try upgrading to 1.5 first, then 1.6. I'll do that as soon as I'm feeling suicidal enough. Supervisor 194 18:03, 24 Apr 2006 (PDT)

April SA Banner is Up

Let the banning begin! Supervisor 194 08:48, 5 Apr 2006 (PDT)

There Is No News

SA ads will begin again in April... once I recover from being poor. Until then, we will have to settle for our slow trickle.

SA Banner Fucked Up

The January Banner on SA didn't link to the website, which is why our traffic was low. I contacted technical support. As you can see, their technical support staff was not exactly helpful. I emailed them AGAIN, and got this brilliant response from radium his own self:

Subject: Re: Ticket 692, I purchased an ad, but it is not linked.

I have no idea, send your first and last name so I can do a refund on
this.  Your ad is coming up fine for me.

Yeah, um. Thanks. So hopefully, our banner ad for February will bring in more users. I still haven't been refunded. I was refunded! So yeah. No banner ads in the "contest." Fine. I'll use an old one.

SpamBot Holocaust

I wonder aloud whether or not there are ways to delete the hundred entries that these spambots leave behind without going to each one and deleting them personally. Like, interacting directly with the database. I will be researching this. In the meantime, it would be nice to have some sysops keeping an eye on recent changes to see if spambots are getting through. I installed the Bad Behavior MediaWiki extension a couple months ago after the first major attack, and since then what spambots have gotten through (like three, I think) only manage to get a few posts in before they get choked by the software. Today, however, another one managed to get like a hundred entries in. Bad Behavior 2.0 is coming out soon, so until then, we gotta just watch out for 'em and hopefully ban 'em before they can do any real damage. Spam sucks. People who spam should be summarily shot. Supervisor 194 08:09, 2 Jan 2006 (PST)

EOS During the Holidays

Well, EOS is off to a good start. We've been advertising the site to fellow goons on Something Awful, mainly because we are goons ourselves and we are of the opinion that this is the sort of humor that goons are the best at and enjoy reading/writing. But because during the holidays everybody is so busy with other things, we're pulling back advertising until after the first of the year, when we will start rotating banners again. The banners have been extremely successful, translating into about one user per dollar. Of course, only one in ten of those actually writes anything thats worth a fuck, but this is about the ratio one might expect for something like this. To everyone who has contributed to EOS, thank you! It's some really great stuff. Supervisor 194 11:13, 19 Dec 2005 (PST)

What Appears Below and In the Picture Above is Odd, Non-Sequitur Humor That Was Created During the First Days of EOS' Inception, and Does Not Purport to Have Any Real Meaning or Be Making Any Particular Statement

Nigga Stole My MMT-8! :(

Haha that is so wacky! - CIAO FOR THIS UPDATE!~

What in the