Supreme Court

From Encyclopedia Of Stupid

The Supreme Court is stupid.

The Supreme Court's job is to look at laws that have been passed by Congress and determine if they violate the US Constitution. For instance, the First Amendment of the US Constitution says that "Congress shall make NO law abridging our freedom of speech." So when Congress makes a law obliterating freedom of speech, the Supreme Court's job is to make it seem like Congress is not really doing that.

The way the Court does this is to make up cool phrases like "clear and present danger" and "obscenity is a community decision" that make it O.K. for Congress to tell people to shut up or to "take that guy's penis out of your mouth". When Mrs. Roe decided to kill her unborn baby, the Supreme Court said it was okay because the baby wouldn't have lived outside the womb anyways. Well, that was a no-brainer because Ms. Roe wasn't going to feed the bastard or turn off the bath water in time even it was 2 years old. The Supreme Court has made other stupid decisions, like recently the court systems overseas decided that fantasy sports don't violate licensing agreements or constitute illegal gambling. Probably the most notable Supreme Court decision was in the 19th Century when they decided that African Americans were 3/5ths human. Why 3/5ths? Why not 6/5ths? Fractions can be used to empower or marginalize. I say empower! The USA Patriot Act stripped ALL Americans of most of their Civil Liberties. The Supreme Court also thought that was a really cool idea because with the Constitution gutted, they would not have to work as hard. Next week, the Supreme Court is going to outlaw its own decisions; shortly afterward, they're going to go home to watch porn and smoke marijuana for the remainder of their lives, until they're dead; then they'll get a pension until their hair and nails stop growing in their graves. Right before they die, they're going to change the definition of "death" to one of a no growth policy.